KSTK 101.7 FM Wrangell

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WOMAN: Miss Kelson. Ms. Hana. Good evening, Miss Kelson. LUCY: Linda. [SIGHS] George? GEORGE: Help! I’m in my closet. George. Good. You’re here. What is it? That is a very attractive pink thing. George, what is it? I’m judging the Miss New York contest in under an hour. It’s on television. What do you think? Don’t tell me you called me out of a wedding to help you pick out a suit. You ran out of a wedding? You said it was an emergency! Didn’t I memo you as to what constitutes an emergency? Yes. Large meteor, severe loss of blood and what’s the third one again? Death! Death. And you’re not dead. No. You weren’t dead when you called me at : a.m… because you had a nightmare about becoming a KISS member. Just like when you barged in on my woman’s doctor appointment… to ask me which picture to put on the cover of People. I don’t like those very much. If it’s any consolation, I will be dead eventually. Tonight is important. I’m representing the Wade organization. That includes you. Not anymore, George. I’m sorry? You got the towers, I got Coney Island. Why don’t we just call it quits, okay? I can’t take it anymore. What, are you serious? Yes. Please, consider this my two weeks’ notice. I find you ungrateful. Ungrateful? Yes, ungrateful. Ungrateful?! Yes. I hire you with no corporate experience. I give you an apartment, an office, the nonfat-muffin basket every morning. George! Why do you keep your phone on? Because you like emergencies. You crave the excitement. All right, George. You are absolutely right. This has nothing to do with you. This is entirely my thing… because I’ve managed to turn myself into this… There’s not even a name for it. It’s not like I enjoy it either. Before you came into my life I was capable of making decisions. Now I can’t. I’m addicted. I have to know what you think. What do you think? George. I think you are the most selfish human being on the planet. That’s just silly. Have you met everyone on the planet? Goodbye, George. I don’t have a shirt. LUCY: Ansel, I finally quit. He called me out of Meryl’s wedding. I’ll never get that moment back. ANSEL: Okay. LUCY: I’ll interview with firms that do pro bono work… ANSEL: Hang on. LUCY: What? ANSEL: We’re shipping out. I gotta go. You take care of yourself. All right. ANSEL: I gotta go, hon. Okay, just don’t fall in love with any cute marine biologists. Okay, I promise. Bye. Okay. Love you. Bye. [PHONES RINGING] MAN: Lowell, Hanes and Richards. LUCY: I look forward to a new challenge… and your firm has the optimal blend of public and private interest law. Lucy, your résumé is amazing. You know that. But we do a lot of business with Wade. More reason for me to make a smooth transition. Lucy. Yes. George Wade called me this morning and informed me… that you are indispensable to his organization. Ah. At the moment, we’re not hiring. Then why did you agree to see me? Honestly, we’re partners with Zodiac Construction… They do millions of dollars of business with Wade Realty… And Mr. Wade… Doesn’t want you to hire me. The attorney who was planning to quit reconsidered. When did Mr. Wade call? He never called. When?! Maybe an hour ago. Make sure you massage his cloven hoof! GEORGE: I’m feeling a pain in my ass. I am unemployable! You called everyone except for Slurpee Heaven! That is not true. I did call Slurpee Heaven. They didn’t want you. You had attitude. You weren’t Slurpee material. You should really let us work on you. I don’t like to be touched! I’m sorry, you guys are great. It’s not you. All right, listen. You have a contract and it says you will work until Island Towers is finalized. Which is completion of construction, or I can stop you working elsewhere. And there’s no loopholes because you drafted it and you’re the best. I think you drafted it that way because you don’t really want to go. Does it kill you how well I know you? Honey, this contract is excellent work. I’m very proud of you. LUCY: Dad, I’m trying to get out of it. I don’t know why you went to work for that philandering robber baron. You usually have impeccable instincts. Look at your boyfriend, Ansel. He’s a dedicated environmental warrior. This is ironclad. Houdini couldn’t get out of this contract. You should’ve stayed at the legal aid job. If I do pro bono work with a company with these resources… I can accomplish so much… Come on over for strawberry ice cream. Have Tofutti! You heard what the doctor said. Your cholesterol is over ! You’re basically a solid. Two of the greatest legal minds in this country arguing over dessert. Lucy, it was your choice to work for that man. You could’ve done anything. You could’ve clerked for the Supreme Court. I don’t know what to tell you. Short of going in and deliberately trying to get fired. RUTH: You stay away from that freezer! Good morning, boys. Oops. Sorry, I am so late. That’s fine. We only just got here. Forty-five minutes ago. LUCY: Hmm. Howie, are these your kids? You know, I’ve never actually met them. They are good-looking boys. That’s a girl. That’s Sue and Paul. LUCY: Yes, so it is. You know what? She is gonna be a heartbreaker.

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